Washington Divorce

Divorce, How to rebuild your life, find a new hobby

2010-08-31T13:31:00.000-07:00

Moving on is very important when it comes to rebuilding your life after divorce. You will be out of it for a while, but you will find that you can rebuild yourself and learn from your mistakes. It is hard to part from someone who once was a part of who you where, but you will find that you can move on and find new things in your life to bring you joy and happiness. You can find a new hobby at your church, within your community, or within your home.

After you have allowed yourself to grieve, you will begin to want to find other things to fill your hours. If you are the type of person who like to be alone, you should find new things to learn that you can do by yourself. Take an art class at the local community college. Learn how to sculpt or do pottery. You can also learn how to write. You can write a story or article about your life to describe what you are going through. You may find that your hobby could turn into something that you can pursue as a career. You will be able to spend the hours productively than sitting in front of the TV eating ice cream.

Some women will take up a hobby that gets them back into interacting with others. You may want to join a local pool or bowling league. You may go to the community center and join a card game once a week. If you really want to get back into the interaction, you should take dance lessons. Learn how to ballroom or to do some jazz. Then you will be able to learn something and find something new to enjoy. You don't have to go alone, you can take a brother or cousin or dear friend to be your partner. It will be something new to experience. If dancing doesn't sound like a good hobby, you can take up a local job of something that you already know.

If you were really good at a sport, you may want to become an assistant coach or coach of a local high school team or college team. You can start up a new chapter of AYSO or some other thing. You can also do some community service to fill your hours. You can do things like feed the poor; raise money for your church or community, or other services that are needed.

Anything that you can shift your attention to will be a great thing. You will be able to let go of all the hurt and pain and focus on something positive. Even if you would like to increase your reading or do a 25,000-piece puzzle, do anything that will stimulate your mind and allow you to adjust your focus. When you find a hobby or something to focus your attention on you have less of a chance of focusing on the negative or starting bad habits like drinking or smoking. You will be able to find a positive release.

You can take many things, many classes, at local colleges that you can do with a friend. You can learn how to cook, paint, write, or anything else that will stimulate your creativity. Just remember that you need to find something that interests you and that is convenient. You can also find hobbies around the house too. You can go antiquing with a friend or you can remodel or redecorate the entire hours to your likening. Again, anything that will get you to focus on the positive outlooks on life.

Divorce - How to rebuild your life, don't avoid the holidays

2010-08-21T13:30:00.000-07:00

Divorce is something that no one wants to do; however in some cases it is inevitable. This is something that sometimes has to happen so that a person can be happen and feel good about whom they are so that they can start living again. It is important for the two people that are going through the divorce to stay active with friends and family members and to not let it get them down.

The first holiday after your divorce can be the worst. This can be the most uncomfortable situation that you could ever be in. There are some things that you can do to help the holiday go a little bit better and may even help it to be a little easier to deal with the fact that things are no longer the same and that you will have to accept that fact.

No matter what holiday it is, you are going to see that things are different. You will not be the same team that you always were in the past and now you have to find a way to move on and have a great holiday regardless of this fact. You will want to make the experience as easy as you can on everyone including your friends, family and children if you have any.

You may want to consider changing a few things for your next holiday after the divorce. You may have to come with the determination that traditions must change and that you can get through them. You may have to work out arrangements for the children if any and make sure that they are taken care of at this difficult time. You want them to have the best holiday that they can even if it means that you must sacrifice some things.

You may want to find something else to do for your traditions on the holidays. You want to make them fun and entertaining as well as enjoyable and less painful for you and anyone else that is involved in the family function. You also need to make sure that you are taking time out for yourself. You need to keep your thoughts good so that you can stay focused on making this first year the best that you can for everyone.

You want to make sure that you have your own down time. If you feel like being sad or crying, you should be able to do that alone. You may need a few minutes of each day to get yourself composed and feeling better about the entire situation. You need to make sure that your mind is free from any distress when it comes time for the family gathering.

You may want to use some humor for the situation. You need to find the fun side in everything and this will include holidays after your divorce. You need to find ways to laugh even if they are stupid and childish. You want to keep a positive attitude for not only yourself, but also anyone else that may be affected.

Another good idea is to look ahead. You want to stay focused on the future. Remember the first holiday is the worst and things will only get better as time passes and you are able to accept the way that things are a little better. In time you will feel more relaxed and you will not remember this first holiday that made you so upset.

Washington Divorce, how to deal with money issues

2010-08-10T13:29:00.001-07:00

You need to find ways to save money during the divorce so you don't end up going into debt or needing a second job. When your marriage is over, the last thing on your mind should be your money, but it usually is. You have to learn ways to protect yourself so that you have money to live on through the divorce and after the divorce. You will find yourself angry and confused after you have announced your split, but you shouldn't feel overwhelmed about the money you may lose. Many people find out the hard way what divorce really means, and it usually means they leave you with half your stuff.

First, you should never get married without a prenup. If you don't have the prenup, you will be in so much water when the divorce comes. You don't need a prenup just if your rich, you need a prenup regardless off your assets. When it comes to your finances, why on earth take any chances of losing good, hard-earned money? Secondly, you need to know your finances throughout the marriage. You need to know where at least 80% of the money, if not all the money, goes.

You need to know your wealth. You wealth is your assets minus your debts. If you have $10,000 in the bank, and you have a total of $50,000 (which is a combination of credit cards, mortgages, car payments, and other things that you may owe on), then you have $40,000 worth of debt, you're wealth is nothing. However, if you own you own home and paid $40,000 for it, and have a couple thousand on credit and a couple grand left on a car payment, you have a lot of wealth that needs to be protected. Even if you have debt, you want to make sure that you don't get stuck with it by protecting yourself with a clause in your prenup.

As for refinancing during the divorce, anything that the other person wants, make sure you take your name off the deed. If your cars are in both names, get the name taken off just so if they fall behind in payments, you don't have to worry about your credit being ruined. Usually, the house has to be sold and divided so you shouldn't have to do anything about your name on the deed. However, they can buy you out and then you will need to get your name off the deed and the mortgage.

To really know your finances you should get your credit report. Many credit vendors like credit card companies and credit lenders will let you know what your credit is for free. However, there is a $15 fee to know if you get it from a credit report company. You should also open your own bank accounts and always keep your money separate. This way you know what is yours and what is theirs. You will also want to keep your credit cards separate as well. This way you can keep your debt separate too.

When going through the divorce you will want to think about cutting them off your health benefits at work. This way you can save money, plus get them off your benefits completely. You will want to change beneficiaries of any policies that you may have with your mate as the beneficiary. If you took his name, you can file paper work to regain your maiden name, however, it is costly; you may want to save this for later. You will also want to talk to your lawyer about the house. The house should, by rights, sell and the proceeds divided up.

Property Division, Real-Estate, & Washington Divorce Law

2010-06-05T17:45:00.000-07:00

The mortgage rule is a legal tool used to characterize property acquired, using both community and separate funds, over a period of time. Harry M. Cross, The Community Property Law in Washington, 61 WASH. L. REV. 13, 39-49 (rev. 1985).

The mortgage rule examines whether both parties concerned were obligated to make payments in order to retain ownership of the disputed asset. If there was no such continuing obligation, then the character of the asset is retrospectively determined to be proportionate to the ratio of separate and/or community funds used to acquire the asset.

Absent a continuing obligation, the character of the property is retrospectively determined to be proportionate to the ratio of separate and or community funds used to acquire the property

It is precisely this mortgage indebtedness that itself constitutes a contribution to effect the final determination of what proportionate share either party should be entitled to. If the other spouse signs the promissory note they become liable to the bank and later third parties for repayment. Even if that party had low income and no assets to secure the loan it is still a contribution.

If separate funds are used to make a contribution and are traceable a lien for the down-payment amount could be found but only to that extent of that separate contribution to the down payment. However, In Re Hurd changes this slightly in that the separate character of a cash down payment can be transformed into community property by titling the home in both parties names. (Thus we see some significance in whose name an item of property actually stands.)

This includes such assets as the appreciation of retirement plans that were purchased before the marriage. The value of such an asset must be analyzed to determine what portion grew or accumulated during the marriage and the value prior to the marriage.

Washington state divorce law purposefully vests a substantial degree of leeway to the Judges hearing your case (and I say Judges because the Commissioners only deal with pre-trial issues, modifications, and contempt; they can't divide the equity in your home or business). Carefully planning from the start of your case is necessary to develop the evidence needed in property characterization. It also gives the attorney time to become familiar with what both parties real financial futures might look like upon final dissolution of the partnership. This is especially important where one is not dealing with a trivial amount of assets, or if you feel your spouse has a significantly higher earning potential.

Division of real estate under Washington state divorce law can also be made not in accordance with whose name is on the title to the property. Whose name the property is titled in, does not settle the matter conclusively but may be considered by the judge among other factors as possible indicia that the parties wished to make it separate.

Seattle Divorce Attorney Robert Stark specialize in Washington State Divorce family law, child custody law, Washington Divorce cases and much more.

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The Real World of Alimony & Spousal Maintenance Under Washington State Divorce Law

2010-05-29T17:39:00.000-07:00

The only time I see maintenance/alimony awarded in marriages less than five years is where one party is unemployed or would end up on the street if their partner just left them.

Even in those cases, the awarded at temporary orders reads something like: "The [husband/wife] shall pay to the wife maintenance in an amount of $500 for six months or until the wife secures full-time employment.

If full-time employment has not been found in 6 months the [husband/wife] may petition the court for an extension but only for good cause shown."

I have written orders like that many many times. At the temporary orders stage the judge or commissioner makes his or her ruling and says "Counsel, Write up the Orders".

Tradition has it that the primarily prevailing party draws them up; although sometimes a lawyer much older than you will assume that he or she will do the honors.

We then often times have to go back in and argue over them. But that is usually if the attorneys either don't know each other or one is inexperienced. As lawyers we also sit in the back of the courtroom and wait for our case to be called.

During that time we talk with other attorneys about their cases or watch how the judges and commissioners decide other cases in Family Court.

On the other hand marriages longer than 20 years almost always do involve some form of maintenance, or "evening out" of the income and assets over time.

The goal of the Court in such long-term marriages is mainly to maintain the party's financial standing at the same level for a considerable time after the marriage.

Spousal maintenance in Washington has traditionally been defined by an oft-quoted (and legally cited) bar journal article by Judge Windsor. It has been cited in many Washington divorce Supreme court cases.

Recently, there has been discussion regarding a new metaphor. A recent (2006) Washington State Bar Journal article discusses the subject. Maintenance can be highly discretionary and the cases I have dealt with on appeal have been difficult to overturn.

That is basically the general consensus: the Judge or Commissioner must have really, really screwed up before they overturn it. Yes, you are thinking the right thing: it is very important to win at the lower levels.

Don't sit back and comfort yourself that "If they make the wrong decision I can just appeal." This is not tax or corporate law. There are fewer analytical rules to follow. And this is alimony in the real world.

Seattle Divorce Attorney Robert Stark specialize in Washington State Divorce family law, child custody law, Washington divorce cases and much more.

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Issues of Alimony and Division of Property When Filing a Washington Divorce

2010-05-22T17:38:00.000-07:00

The issue of alimony, sometimes referred to spousal support or maintenance is an important issue to consider when proceeding with a divorce. Alimony, known as spousal support or maintenance, is support paid by one spouse to another. In Washington State, at least in theory, alimony is gender neutral, and, if circumstances warrant, the wife can be obliged to pay alimony to the husband. However, although the law is usually written to permit either husband or wife to receive alimony, it is rare for a woman to pay alimony to a man.

Typically, of all the issues needed to be resolved to complete your Washington State divorce, alimony is the issue of least consensus and unification among lawyers and judges. Today there is a growing expectation among lawyers and judges that women can and should support themselves. Alimony is now awarded for a shorter period of time and most likely provides less than the standard of living during the marriage. Alimony is often the most difficult issue to negotiate successfully. It directly addresses the lifestyles of both parties, and when they are not balanced, resentment occurs.

DIVISION OF MARITAL PROPERTY

Another issue of concern to the state during the divorce process is clarity in title to property. Historically, the interest of the state has been to make sure that property could be freely transferred with a clear title. When a marriage dissolves, the state needs to know who owned what property and needs to extinguish any claims each spouse had to the other's property. Therefore, the state asserts that upon the order of a Washington divorce, property be clearly divided into two separate baskets: the husband's and the wife's. Washington Divorce Online's online form preparation services take all these issues into account as the state requires.

Marital property includes anything of value now or in the future that was acquired during the marriage. This includes tangible property such as automobiles, jewelry, and real estate and intangible property such as a pension, patent rights, or retirement accounts. Washington is a community property state and any property owned by either individual prior to marriage is exempt from division. This means that property is not necessarily split 50%/50%.

Whether you and your spouse can negotiate an agreement and complete your Washington divorce forms on your own or you resort to fighting it out in court, these legal issues must be settled and resolved in order for you to be granted a Washington State divorce.

http://www.washingtondivorceonline.com offers preparation of all WA divorce documents online. Includes information and articles about divorce washington state.

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Washington Divorce Legal Issues

2010-05-15T16:46:00.001-07:00

People approaching Washington divorces are often surprised by the deficiency of clear rules. People ask their lawyers, '' How much alimony do I have to pay?'' ''How much child support will I owe?'' How long I will have to pay?'' How much of my pension does she get?" With very few exceptions, Washington Divorce Online has found that the law itself cannot give you very precise answers to these questions.

Either you and your spouse will negotiate a settlement between yourselves or a judge will determine the arrangements for you. In Washington State divorce cases, there are now formal guidelines that the court must follow in awarding child support. However, on most issues, judges are unfettered to implement their own discretion after hearing evidence, and this discretion extends even to child support guidelines.

You take your chances when you and your spouse go to trial. It can be a roll of the dice. Most judges do their best to be fair and professional, but, like the rest of us, judges are susceptible to their own prejudices and biases. If you don't like the judge's decisions you will either learn to live with them or you can appeal to a higher court, but few people ever utilize the appeal process. Appeals are difficult to win because the burden is on the person making the appeal to prove to the higher court that the trial judge misinterpreted the law or abused the discretion permitted the judge by law. Even if you are one of the few who wins on appeal, all you get most of the time is a new trial. The only way to be sure that your Washington divorce meets your needs is for you and your spouse to negotiate the resolution yourselves.

When you negotiate your agreement, you negotiate a contract voluntarily. You sign it voluntarily. You cannot decide that neither of you will support your children, and you cannot subject your children to danger or neglect. But, within very broad limits you are free to decide together, how you will resolve the issues at hand.

Settlement arrangements are negotiated in the shadow of the law. That means, you negotiate with an eye on what you think would happen if you were to go to trial and let the judge decide. Experienced lawyers often think they can predict what would happen at trial. Washington State Divorce lawyers tend to develop a consensus or sense of industry standards about the results of trials. They may agree that the judges "always give the wife half the house" or " a third of the husbands pension." They might agree that in a particular case $200.00 a week for child support would be unlikely. Lawyers who have appeared many times before the same judge may acquire useful generalizations. Much of this may be true indeed, but the truth is that you cannot depend on it. You may get a particular judge, or you may get that judge on a bad day, or your lawyer may be wrong. Although most lawyers will sovereignly foretell the outcome in court, few will guarantee you the conclusion. You need to treat such predictions with healthy skepticism.

Judges understand that you can do a much better job of generating an agreement that works for you both, which is why they don't meddle in a settlement agreement. Ultimately, the Washington divorce law governing your settlement agreement is what you together believe to be fair and in the best interest of your family.

Every uncontested Washington divorce form or Washington divorce decree must deal with five basic issues. These issues deal with: 1) alimony, 2) property division, and, if there are children, 3) custody, 4) visitation, and 5) child support. These five issues must be determined by the divorcing couple in order to obtain an uncontested divorce. If you and your spouse agree on everything and put it in writing, you have an uncontested Washington State divorce; there is literally no contest. If there is any issue on which you disagree, you have a contested divorce. Invariably, contested divorces center around one of the five issues of divorce: property distribution, alimony, custody, visitation, and child support. When a divorce is contested, it is usually because the couple has not been able to agree on one or more of the above mentioned issues.

When a Washington Divorce petition is filed, the state has several concerns that must be satisfied before the divorce is proved up and approved. The state wants to know how the children will be supported, who will support them, and who is in charge of them. The state is the parent of last resort. If children are abandoned, the state must provide for them. Because it wants this role minimized, the state, through its courts, requires that provisions be made for children at the time of the Washington State divorce. Thus the court requires an agreement or a court order specifying the duties and rights of each parent with respect to raising and supporting the children.

Washington Divorce allows you to complete your official Washington State Petition for Dissolution of Marriage, commonly known as divorce, online. This service helps you prepare your Washington State Divorce Forms according to your particular set of circumstances and in a format accepted by Washington Courts. Visit http://www.washingtondivorceonline.com for more info.

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